First things first, let me introduce myself

If I'm going to commit to writing a personal blog then I might as well start with a very basic introduction. Let's get to know each other a little...

My name is Nonhlanhla.

Not a single person in my life actually calls me that. In fact, I have only recently started making it a point to actually use my full name on anything besides official documents. It's been a challenge, but it is definitely starting to grow on me. I shouldn't say this, but it does feel somewhat unfamiliar. See, I have many nicknames. Every social sub-circle I have seems to have adopted a special name for me. My family included. In my 26 years of being alive, I don't actually recall ever being called "Nonhlanhla" at home.

On my 21st birthday, my cousin shared a heartfelt speech. She made a point to mention that she is of the opinion that people who have many nicknames tend to be dearly loved. She might not even know it but I have kept those words so close to my heart ever since.

If it's not already obvious, I have a tricky relationship with my name. I am not ashamed of it. Weirdly enough, I am quite proud of it. It has a beautiful meaning. Prophetic. In isiZulu, my name simply means "mother of luck". I would like to consider myself rather lucky in life at times, and I have my mother to thank for bestwoing such a fate on me with my name. I think after spending most of your life hearing your name being butchered or having to spend at least 5 minutes trying to teach everyone to pronounce your name every time you introduce yourself, it becomes so easy to just accept a lifetime of simple nicknames. However, like most people, I am on a journey of self love. Some days it's learning to love my body, my hair, or personality. These days, it's been about learning to love my name and wearing it proudly.

As I've already mentioned, I'm on a journey. We all are, actually. But anyway, besides learning to fall in love with my name again, I am also on a journey towards being the writer I have always wanted to be. I love words. I leave reading them and I love writing them. I cannot explain the joy I get from witnessing the expression of thoughts and feelings through the written art. So, it has always been pretty obvious to me that I most definitely want to be a writer. It goes without saying that pursuing a creative career is not on the list of 'easiest things to do'. In that pursuit, I have found myself riddled with self-doubt. Keeping my writing a secret. Only following my passions in the dark. But, that is all slowly changing. One of my worst fears is waking up one day and realising that I didn't actually ever give myself the chance to share my words. So here I am, moving away from being the only person in my audience.

I am a believer of many things.

The first being that all things happen for a reason. That experiences, both good and bad, lead us right to where we need to be in life. Somehow, my experiences seem to have lead me to a country thousands of kilometres away from home, where people speak a language I would have never even imagined myself learning to read or write. What lead me to this distant world was my fear of pursuing my dream. I briefly dipped my toe in the world of writing. Like most creative minds, I quickly found myself being consumed and almost crippled by the idea of negative criticism. I feared not meeting the level of my peers. I shyed away from the world I had dreamed of being a part of for so long because I simply felt scared. I just wasn't ready. I had to develop myself further through other experiences first.

Luckily for me, I also believe that life is far too short to only ever be one thing. So the fear of writing was replaced with the excitement of being a teacher. I packed two large suitcase with a year supply of hair products and geared up for an adventure. What was initially supposed to be a year away to explore myself and the world, has now turned into three years of an adventure. In this time, I have learned many new things, not just about the world but about myself too. I have fallen in love with the potential of the unknown. I have been working towards reconnecting with my inner artist and giving her the power to come out and be seen. I have taught myself to walk in giant shoes until I outgrow them, and then searching for the next pair.

This brings me to my final little belief for this first blog post. I strongly believe that everything happens exactly when is supposed to. Although many might choose to shy away from cliches, I happen to find the truth in them. In this case, the cliche that stands to be quite true is that we might not understand why things are happening a certain way in the moment, but as time goes on, the reasons will make themselves evident. In my case, I feel more ready now than I have ever been to fully commit to being a writer. And I have to say that it is all thanks to the past three years of foreign experiences. Without all of the good and bad things that occured in that time, I would not be here today sharing my journey with you.

So, with all of that being said, welcome to this experience. Some days will be more interesting than others. Some more emotional and others somewhat dull. Either way, I will be here, publishing and trying my best to keep improving myself as a writer. I look forward to sharing this journey with you and if you feel inspired to, I hope that you maybe some day share yours with me too.